A Note to Fathers

To the fathers of estranged adult children who have come upon my book, Done With The Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children

Fathers of estranged adult children often ask:

  • Why did you exclude the fathers?

To answer, here’s an excerpt from the book:

A Note to Fathers

You might wonder why I have chosen to direct this book to mothers. In the support forum at www.RejectedParents.NET, and among the thousands of parents who completed my survey, the vast majority are mothers. In fact, less than seven percent of my survey respondents were fathers. Of these, a great many ticked off only the basic, categorical answers, ignoring the empty boxes in which so many mothers poured out their sadness as they wrote in their stories. That’s why I have chosen to title and direct the book to mothers as the main audience—but that doesn’t mean this book won’t help you.

Women frequently report that their husbands aren’t as burdened by the estrangement as they are. It’s more likely that you handle your emotions in different, and perhaps more subtle ways. The fact is that regardless of gender, no two individuals are the same. We all process emotions and handle problems differently, based on a variety of factors such as personality, upbringing, and our particular history.

While the stories in the book are from the mother’s perspective, many of the examples are of couples, and include the experiences of fathers. Some passages directly highlight men’s reactions by using my husband’s emotions, as well as the reactions of other men. The principles presented are relevant to fathers, and the strategies for coping can be used by anyone.

Fathers, I hope you will reach out, and let me know how you used the book—and how I might better help you in the future.  ~~ –Sincerely, Sheri McGregor

Available through popular booksellers. Ask your local bookstore to order this book for parents of estranged adult children for you. Or order online at:
Amazon
Barnes And Noble

Not in the U.S — you can still get the book. Ask your local bookstore, or order at Amazon.ca or Amazon.com/uk

One parent recently told me they appreciated the way the title was arranged. The subtitle is very small, so the subject matter isn’t obvious–making it easy to carry inconspicuously.

6 thoughts on “A Note to Fathers

  1. Tim Stevens

    Hello Sheri-

    Your book is the best and most relevant resource I have found yet to help me deal with my feelings about my estranged children. Fathers are more likely to be estranged from adult children. I was a single father for years, a stay at home dad for my son’s first two years, (he is now 30) when it was unusual.

    I know more estranged parents who are fathers than are mothers. We usually don’t get custody. I also know a number couples who are both estranged. ……..A book they could share would be a wonderful thing in supporting each others’ healing…….

    Best regards,

    Tim Stevens

    Reply
    1. rparentsrparents Post author

      Thank you for your input, Tim. I have heard from several women whose husbands are using the book in conjunction with them. I’m so glad you found it “the best and most relevant resource” you’ve found. Perhaps in the future I can write something for men specifically, or in addition to the chapter that deals with couples, an entire book for couples.

      Thank you again. I wish you the best now and in the future.

      Sheri McGregor

  2. Sam

    Sheri, Thank you for your kind and compassionate book. I am moving on. I told my estranged daughter I would always love her. The ball is in her court now. I hope other father’s whose ex spouses have alienated them will read the book and learn the steps.

    Reply
    1. Peter M.

      Thank you for your comment. I find it helpful. My ex wife has perpetrated alienation of affection on my 3 adult children. I’m in therapy and that has helped. I hope I’m approved into this group

  3. Annie

    Hi Peter,
    Of course you’re welcome here. Parental alienation is real. I see it every day in my husband’s practice as I’m his legal assistant. PA is misused much of the time as a vindictive approach but for the most part; it is a ploy. Sadly it hurts the children far worse than the divorcing parties. I know you probably let them know how much you love them and are there for them regardless of all that’s been thrown at you. Keep your head up and move forward. Im sure you don’t deserve this kind of treatment. Hold your children closer. Blessings, Annie

    Reply
  4. Delance J.

    Hello Sheri
    I also am an estranged father. I have two adult children from my first marriage and two adult children from my second marriage,both ending in divorce.
    Like so many Fathers I was present in their upbringing as well as being present in their adulthood.
    I found this site through a google search and found it interesting and informative.
    I’m currently seeking therapy for my situation with all 4 of my adult children.
    The ones from my first marriage are the children whom I have the more relevant issues with despite my many attempts to stay in touch with them.
    I have not yet read your book but considering purchasing it.It just may help me process what I’m going through as I deal with my rejection as well as my mother, their grandmother, being rejected

    Reply

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