August 1, 2016 at 5:33 am #13934MountainviewParticipant
My Dearest Friends,
The time has come for me to say my farewell in the 5 languages that I speak.
English – Goodbye
German – Aufwiedersehen
Spanish – Adios
French – Au Revoir
Portuguese – Adeus
While we may live in different countries and speak different foreign languages throughout the world, the language of “LOVE” is universal. There are no borders, no geographical or geo-political boundaries, no fences or walls for mothers all across the globe to feel in their heart the language of pain, loss, and unconditional love for her child.
But how do you cope with the pain and loss of a child you love so deeply in your heart?
How can you ever recover and heal from one of the most painful experiences in your life -the loss of your beloved child?
As mentioned in my first Forum posts “Every Cloud has a “Silver Lining”, the journey to recovery, the path to healing is uniquely different for each human being. Simply put, there’s no single magical pill, a proven panacea, or the perfect road to travel that would equally serve each one of us well. How to cope with grief and loss is as unique as our DNA. What has worked for me may simply not work for someone else. And that is perfectly ok. If we were all exactly the same…life wouldn’t be nowhere near as brilliantly diverse, and as amazingly interesting in all its offerings.
My estrangement with my only two children began in this New Year 2016. A beautiful daughter and a handsome son, both successful adults who are happy and living their lives as they should. We will always love and honor our children to the day we die, the day when we take our last breath.
When Sheri’s book was published in May, 2016, I felt immediately compelled to purchase her book: Done With The Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children
The purchase of Sheri’s book was one of the best decisions of my life. Sheri’s priceless book gave me all the necessary advice and all the necessary tools I needed to my recovery. It became my healing bible.
A month later, in June, I joined this amazing virtual Forum and outstanding, global support team of loving mothers grieving the loss of their beloved children due to this silent epidemic of “estrangement”.
With each passing day, more and more parents find themselves in the same situation. So many parents have suffered in silence for years or decades from the children’s estrangement.
I have learned so much from Sheri’s countless educational and inspirational posts on her website http://www.rejectedparents.net. I have learned so much from Sheri’s priceless therapy book, my healing bible. I have learned so much from all the mothers (and fathers) whose loving, supportive voices, and advice I have read and listened to. While, I was not a prolific writer on this Forum, I attentively listened to each and everyone’s beautiful voice.
Within 6 months – I have recovered. I have healed! I have found inner peace and acceptance.
What I thought back in early January 2016 to be the darkest moments and the final sunset of my life has turned out to be brightest times and the sunrise of my life. I see the glistening, golden sun rise up every morning, and I am grateful and praise God to be alive. Just as one of my favorite sayings:
“The Sun is Always Shining Upon Us – No Matter How Stormy Your Local Weather May Be”.
We know the journey to recovery is not easy. Only you know what’s best of you. Anything worth its rewards takes hard work to achieve it. Therefore, it’s up to each individual mom or dad, at their own pace – be it through baby steps or giants leaps – to find healing and peace. With love, empathy and compassion, resilience and perseverance, one by one, we hope and pray for a better future, look into the horizon and find the courage and strength to confidently move onward with our lives.
My Dearest Sheri,
As mentioned before, I believe the greatest gift is the gift of learning, and that gift is not complete until it is passed on. Your published book ’Done With The Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children’ and your dedicated website is a gift that keeps on giving for all those parents who may have suffered in silence for many years, and for all those parents who recently faced the shock, shame and pain of being rejected, abandoned or estranged by their adult child/children.
If all the mothers on this site are your “Honey Bees” – then you are our “Queen Bee” Sheri 🙂
I hope and pray you will be richly rewarded with endless honey – because you deserve it my sweet friend 🙂
I will forever be grateful and remember you Sheri! I will forever be grateful and remember all the loving support during my 6 months’ journey!
It’s time for me to move on and live my life to its fullest potential. I am going to do all the things I have always enjoyed in my life.
I am going to live my life. I am going love, embrace, laugh, crack jokes, travel, plant, garden, swim, dance, sing, hike, climb, cook, savor, entertain, draw, paint, photograph, write, read, raft, row, sail, and listen to all my favorite music from Jazz to Opera, from Rhythm and Blues to Samba, from Soft Rock to Country.
Just like Tim McGraw’s Song: “Live Like You Were Dying” – That’s exactly what I am going to do 🙂
I LOVE YOU ALL!!!
August 1, 2016 at 3:26 pm #13941RainbowParticipant
Mountainview, we will miss you! I am glad to know that you have reached your place of healing. Peace be with you, my friend. Go out there and ENJOY YOUR LIFE. We love you back. Rainbow
August 1, 2016 at 7:58 pm #13945AUSSIEMOMParticipant
Thank you for your input into the forum, Mountainview, I hope one day your children will return to your family as we all would like to hope for. You’ve done remarkably well to have healed in six months since your estrangement and are able to move on with such a positive attitude.
August 3, 2016 at 1:16 am #13975DollyParticipant
Wow! I hope I have a similar success story. Congrats! I just arrived and here you go. Isn’t that the way life is. Except for some of us our children arrive amid tears of joys and exit our lives leaving questions and broken hearts. Good luck to you as you enter your new phase of life.
My book arrived on Saturday and I have read and re-read the first chapter. I am contemplating the exercises and plan on journaling as soon as my husband snoozes. I already feel better, but I’m not close to Mountainview’s big step.
Fare thee well! 🙏
August 10, 2016 at 12:28 am #14037rparentsKeymaster
You have spent the time you needed, and you have made your mark. I will never forget you for your generosity and kindness. I’m grateful to have been a small part of your healing process but you did it on your own. As is true for each of us, healing begins with a choice. You made a wise one.
Enjoy your view from the top. And as Rainbow said, enjoy your life!
August 17, 2016 at 6:07 am #14157quiltmomParticipant
Wow! Mountainview, I don’t know you, but I am hoping to be where you are someday.
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