Keep on living

Viewing 10 reply threads
  • Author
    Posts
    • #18890
      AvatarHinnro
      Participant

      Its been awhile for me since Ive been on this site. Im doing well and just keep putting one foot in front of another. I heard something that really kind of hit home. I think it explains how I think most of us feel. It was asked “how do you survive such tragity….the answer…you just keep on living until you become alive. Its like a lightbulb went off in my head. Im living every day and slowly becoming more alive. It maybe the life I want to have with my ED but I am accepting it more and more. Blessings to all.

    • #18925
      AvatarRainbow
      Participant

      Hinnro, it’s good to hear from you. Somehow we learn to survive the nightmare. We learn to live our new normal. We learn to laugh again and yes I must agree with you that it is not the life we would have chosen. I believe we will always grieve for what could have been, but our EC made the choice and we must learn to accept, move on and enjoy life. We were handed lemons and somehow we make lemonade. I am glad to hear you are doing well. Hugs sent your way. Rainbow

    • #18922
      AvatarSunflowersDay
      Participant

      One foot ahead of the other. I do this every day hoping that one day it will all become automatic!
      Blessings to you too and thank you.
      SunflowersDay

    • #18937
      AvatarViolet
      Participant

      Hinnro, hello…”you just keep on living until you become alive”…this struck such a chord because that is exactly what happens. It almost sneaks up on you. You pray for it, you work for it, and little by little, it happens! The shock factor of the missing EC will always be there I suspect but seems to recede year after year. Wishing you peace and joy!
      Violet

    • #18945
      Yellow RoseYellow Rose
      Participant

      Very true words. Life is not always kind to us but we have to keep on living and doing whats best for our own well being. I often think that if these situations were with a stranger, a co-worker, a neighbor or even a friend, we would not put up with it, nor grieve for the loss of this relationship. We love our kids and we want them to love us. Some people are just not capable. Or some AC feel torn between mom and dad, and go the path of least resistance — even if it is not fair to the “good” or “kind” or “nice” parent. It is often easier on them to appease the demanding and manipulative parent cause they know the other parent is “safe” and isn’t going to attack back. Plus, I think they justify being so ugly in their minds, giving it a false reason, just to be able to live with their negative actions towards us. So it becomes “we deserve it” even when we don’t, or no human being would ever deserve the bad treatment we get.

    • #18964
      AvatarSunflowersDay
      Participant

      Hinnro, I think your statement: “you just keep on living until you become alive”, is really the most profound statement for me personally that I have read and it affected me so that I put it down on some drawing paper and will frame it. I’m putting a little border around it, some kind of artwork. It will hang next to my bed on the wall. That statement turned into a very satisfying little project!
      Thank you, Hinnro, for this! Your words have helped several people here. I recently have hit a bump in the road and needed this so badly.
      SunflowersDay

    • #18941
      AvatarAlexandra
      Participant

      What a wise post, Hinnro. I’m getting there, learning to put one foot ahead of the other and find some clarity and value in my own life post-estrangement. We do have to learn to live for ourselves. We only have so much life and it’s up to us to make it count. Thank you.

      Alexandra

    • #18993
      AnnAnn
      Participant

      Yellow Rose: Plus, I think they justify being so ugly in their minds, giving it a false reason, just to be able to live with their negative actions towards us. So it becomes “we deserve it” even when we don’t, or no human being would ever deserve the bad treatment we get.

      I think you hit the nail on the head there!

      In the past whenever anyone asked how I coped with my first child’s dire prognosis and eventual death I always used to say “I cope because I have to, I have no choice”. In fact there are only ever two choices – cope or give up. All on here have chosen to cope, to go on living with “IT” until “IT” no longer defines us or destroys us.

      And the day my blood pressure reads any where near normal will be the best day of my life! 🙂

    • #19006
      AvatarHinnro
      Participant

      I wish I could take credit…I just happened to come across it and it spoke to me. Im glad it has influenced you all. Sometimes its those little reminders that help us survive the day. Remember you are not alone and you will find love…understanding….and compassion here. Blessings!

    • #19036
      Avatartiredmom
      Participant

      Hinnro-
      What a wise philosophy. Thank you for sharing.

    • #19101
      AvatarSunflowersDay
      Participant

      Right you are Ann, they justify being so ugly in their own minds, giving false reasons to justify their actions. It then becomes that we deserve it! How right! Exactly the words I needed to see.

      Together we are stronger. Blessings to all of you!

      SunflowersDay

Viewing 10 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.