Rejected parents: In trying times, “check in”

by Sheri McGregor, M.A.

adult son hates meSeveral years ago, I created a self-monitoring kit for a mental health organization. It was based on the concept of “checking in” with yourself each day. Testing the wind, so to speak, but about your own feelings. (Or is that “tasting” the wind, like Gingersnap is doing in the photo?) When it comes to nurturing our well-being, awareness is important. In troubling times, awareness can be a first line of defense. So try checking in.

During this Covid-19 pandemic, or any stressful time (such as estrangement), try “checking in.”

Notice your how you’re feeling physically and emotionally upon awaking and at checkpoints throughout the day. By noticing, you can then take steps to take care.

If you awaken worried, take note. Ask yourself if there is anything you can do in this moment to solve the worries? If not, is there anything you can do on this day, this week, and so on. Jot down any insights. Then, thank your mind for trying to work things out for you, and give yourself permission to let the worries go.

Check in later in the day, too. Are you unusually grouchy? Are you sniping at other people or gravitating toward Internet doom and gloom. Check yourself. Also, consider what may be fueling your feelings. Be careful of your media diet. While it’s never good to bury your head in the sand, it’s also not good to fill up on hype or hysteria.

Are you thinking about how much it hurts that your estranged adult child doesn’t bother to see how you’re doing, even in such a scary time? It is hurtful, so allow a few moments to feel those emotions. Cry or vent (a little) if you must. The intensity of the feelings will pass. And how you respond can help them move along.

Take good care of yourself

Sometimes, a negative mood, fitful sleep, or physical issues are best managed with good old fashioned TLC. Even if you’re staying in, get up, groom, and dress. You’ll feel better when you catch a glimpse of a tidied-up you in the mirror (rather than a slouchy robe and food-coated teeth).

Eat purposefully, too. When we’re stressed, it’s easy to reach for the chips and chocolate. Anything in moderation, but be sure you’re giving your body what it needs to thrive. You’ll feel better emotionally when you’re running on healthful fuel. If you’re checking-in with bodily complaints, take heed.  Indigestion: Could it have been all those mixed nuts? Sore lower back: Could it be from too much sitting? Connecting physical symptoms with behavior can help you gain awareness toward positive change.

Exercise is another way to care for yourself. Sitting around can feel paralyzing. Make your house and/or yard a walking track. (Try singing while you walk. Beats ruminating about everything you cannot change.) Try standing on one foot and then the other. Sweep the floor, clean the walls, vacuum your car. Exercise doesn’t have to be a standard fitness routine. Just get moving. All the better if what you do has a purpose (my car is filthy right now).

Get a dose of social connection

Confined to home in Italy, neighbors strummed guitars and sang from their balconies. Their social distancing while socializing nurtured a basic human need.

Reach out to friends by telephone or email daily. Share a coffee break by phone, or at lunch with a friend on Face time or by phone. Wave to your neighbors and your mail clerk. If you’re video conferencing from work, allow a few extra moments for each of your associates “check in” about how they’re doing personally before the work starts. If you go out for essentials, chat with the store clerk (they’re extra busy and stressed right now, too).

Members of the support forum here at RejectedParents.Net value the social support of fellow members. Internet forums abound. Do you want to do more gardening this year? Maybe it’s time to join a planting forum. Are you planning to restore a classic car? There are forums with like minded individuals who have lots of knowledge to share. Planning an RV trip? You’ll find a forum for that … and just about any other subject. Think for a moment: What do I want to do or learn? (Check in with yourself.) Then take action.

Look for the beauty

Whether that means physical beauty such as a sunrise, sunset, or blooming flower, or the beauty of the human spirit such as neighbors helping neighbors, seek out the good. Although the ugly is so often pointed out, there is also beauty—-take note, let it infuse you with compassion, joy, and a sense that all will be right with the world again.

In Done With The Crying, there are numerous strategies to build a happier spirit, take care good of yourself, and regain your footing when estrangement has tilted your world. During times of uncertainty (this Covid-19 pandemic qualifies!), turn back to some of those strategies.

What are you doing to help yourself? What can you share to help other rejected parents? Please leave a comment.

Related Reading

Dealing With Uncertainty

When the world is scary: bend and twist

Parents abandoned by adult children: Shape your “new normal”

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33 thoughts on “Rejected parents: In trying times, “check in”

  1. Aleda T.

    I appreciate this and all the positive suggestions. Yes, I am trying to keep busy at home with the goal of having a clean, organized home. In sorting papers, I did discover a disturbing email from my daughter (then still a teen) wanting to not see me. I am doing my best to “let it go”.

    Thank you for all you do to support parents of estranged children.

    Reply
    1. Deletedsunshine

      I am brand new to the group. And i thought that I was alone. This whole ordeal with my daughter has me jus beyond devastated. Some days I don’t know if I’m coming or going! But so appreciative that God put this group in my path in order to navigate my way. IM SO LOST!! But im checking in!

  2. Lois G.

    Staying in contact with friends and family helps to keep the hurt at bay most of the time. I still have moments of sadness throughout the day, but I’m sure we all do.

    Thanks for checking in with us Sheri. It means so much to have a place to go and share feelings about adult estrangement with others who understand. Please stay well everyone.

    Reply
    1. rparents Post author

      Lois G., Did you say, “thanks for CHECKING IN”? Thank you for this pun (given the article). You made me smile today.

      Hugs,
      Sheri McGregor

  3. Elizabeth

    Appreciate your words, Sheri!! Hope your move is progressing along ok. We WISH we could move…2 weeks ago in our 55+ apt, a raging bull elephant moved in…the stomping is nearly to drive me mad…and other than going out to sit in the car, being it is still too cold here to sit on porch, that is about the only choice I have. Other than no more worries over any noise we might make LOL!! I NEED to pare down, etc but have not felt emotionally up to that task. Hubby has been coughing for over a month…but probably it is his seasonal allergies…but it has been worrisome at times. No other signs it is a virus so of course, there is no medicals to see in this area. But we feel in time, he will be ok. Doing all we know to do at home.

    Reply
    1. E O'neill

      I hope that the elephant above you is a kind one. I am happy that your noise of joy is heard by me!! take care sweet persona

    2. Effie

      oh I got anxiety just hearing about the stomping…. We so need our home to be a refuge especially during the covid and the estrangement. Pray this will solve itself.. It would drive me up the walls and I would not be able to handle it at all… I am a country girl.. Hugs to you..

  4. E O'neill

    thank you. You have all saved my life. as an estranged parent /physician i have seen the current crisis as a potential remedy to exit this situation but I remain to help those that are still fighting to stay. When I see that I am not alone it has helped me significantly. I hope that you all can continue your time in isolation with peace and hope. stay alone in persona, but remain connected in soul. a lost mom

    Reply
  5. Jean H.

    I lost my 3 adult children 5 years ago. Last year my middle child, my daughter, had her first child. The window opened a little, I was able to meet my little granddaughter, with my daughter a few months after baby was born. Slowly, making progress. I never thought I would get this chance, and I am very lucky.
    So I guess I would say there is a chance. I wrote a note to myself, that if I ever got the chance, I would do whatever I could, to have my family back.
    Not quite normal, yet, but slow, steady progress. Lots of praying. And honesty and kindness. Hoping for everyone to have kindness.

    Reply
    1. mary t.

      im so happy to hear this; my therapist suggested this site; i have 2 granddaughters 5 1/2 and 4 and due to past actions and when my older granddaughter was 2 my daughter and i had a huge blowout;

      she will not text, email or accept any calls; even her sister tried as well as my daughters husband and she will not budge. they live in MA and i’m in NY ; i saw my older granddaughter every month when she was born;
      my heart is broken yet recently i was suggested to pray for acceptance that this is the way she will be instead of praying for my daughter to have some sort of relationship.

      thank you and ill be praying for you.

    2. Esther

      This gives me hope. While she has already had her first child, my first granddaughter, summer of 2017, shortly after my rounds of chemo, I have yet to hear from her. I pray, dream grit my teeth in my sleep, garden, vacuum, clean, mope, brush my hair, do ANYTHING to keep myself busy during this pandemic to keep from worrying even more. I typically “hate” this Mother’s Day weekend, but letting that go too. Reading this makes me feel hopeful. It’s been 8 years.

  6. Jeanine

    Sheri,
    This came at a good time for me. Aa few days before my April Fools Day 70th birthday, I reached out to my estranged son and daughter-in-law ( I think it has been three years now since Christmas) I texted that I was thinking of them in LA and how were they doing with all that was going on. xoxo.

    Nothing back. No birthday wishes. I reached out, not to get Bday wishes but because I wanted to.
    I was marginally proud of myself for not writing. ” Thinking of you. In case you were wondering I am still alive or I’m not dead yet.” as well as ” Are we done with this ricidulousness yet?” What does it take?
    Was hoping that this major event might be a resent. ah well…
    I see traits reminiscent of my mother who managed to hold a grudge for 40 years against me for opting out of a trip with her when I was in college. Genetics? They are actually both the same zodiac sign, if you put any store into that sort of thing.
    It is some comfort that I am not alone in my situation… As I check in as you suggest, I notice I am OK
    with this. I wish him well and hope he does not have any more emotional problems affecting him.

    Reply
    1. rparents Post author

      Dear Jeanine,

      Happy belated birthday!

      It may very well be genetic. Many of us can identify characteristics that are familiar. . . .

      Please take kind care of yourself. It was nice of you to reach out. The outcome doesn’t detract from that!

      Hugs,
      Sheri McGregor

    2. Trish

      I think it might be genetics with my daughter,too. My mother was a very heartless and cruel person. I always swore my daughter and I would never be like that to each other. Unlike my mother and I, my daughter and I were very close when she was a child. As she hit her teens she got rebellious. Everyone told me it was a phase. But it wasn’t. She moved out at 18 yrs. old and things have been terrible ever since. That was 23 yrs. ago and we have not been on good terms for years. I have tried several times to try to repair our relationship but to no avail. She now has a 3 yr. old son (my grandchild) that I only got to see a few times. We are not communicating at all since last July (9 months). I emailed her asking if she and the baby are ok with this coronavirus spreading around,but got no response. I emailed her on the baby’s Bday wishing him a Happy Bday but got no response. I am 68 yrs.old and am depressed over this. My friends have such good relationships with their grown children and they see their grandchildren. I am so embarrassed and hurt that things have to be this way with my daughter.

  7. Doris

    The Coronavirus situation has been both one of hope and finality and realization for us. My daughter has not contacted us for almost 3 years after declaring us the worst parents ever, etc (not true). Worse still, she walled us off from our grandson, who we had practically raised for his first 5 years and had a major role in his life for the next 5, when she kicked us out of both their lives. Our grandson loves us immensely and we him as well. Now she is working from home for the time being, probably soon to be furloughed, and his school is closed through the end of the year. Her second husband is still working but it’s not a good marriage and may be abusive. We have no way of knowing anything, as we are blocked in every way possible.
    While given that our daughter’s personality disorders and emotional illness no doubt will prevent any future interactions with her under any circumstances, we had held out some hope that perhaps some relationship with our grandson might someday take place – he is now 12. I had thought when covid-19 and all its consequences hit, maybe this would change things. Clearly it will not and this shows the depth of her hatred of us. I have thus abandoned hope for any change for the foreseeable future as to being with our grandson, which is another way of saying acceptance is better than false hopes forever being dashed. As my husband said, “If this doesn’t crack her, nothing will.” We will continue to believe, rather than hope, that when our grandson reaches an age when he is not under the fear and control of his mother, and can take the actions he wants to , we will see him again. And while there is a very good chance that we may no longer be around if and when that happens, we will at least have enjoyed in that interim period, the many memories we have of our time with him. We will continue to not “cry because it’s over, but rather smile because it happened.” (Dr. Seuss)
    We hope other rejected parents have a better outcome during this crisis, as their children contemplate their parents’ new mortality challenges. Take care everyone.

    Reply
    1. rparents Post author

      Dear Doris,

      Thank you for sharing your story here, and your beautiful wisdom. I know your note will bring insight and inspiration to others who read here. You’re a beautiful soul.

      Hugs to you,
      Sheri McGregor

    2. mary t.

      hi trish
      i am knew to this site and i am relating to all your thoughts to a tee. i havent seen my granddaughters 5 1/2 and 4 since 10/2019 and be for that it was in 6/2019. She as welll will not repond to text , emails phone callls; she tells her sister that she wants me to have a relationship with the girls but won’t communicate so howw is this possible?? As you, she is a hospice nurse in MA and when the Covid 19 came around i reached out and nothing…. Even when i send the girls a card or a gift their is no communication so i don’t even know if they get it.. I listen to my friends who have grandchildren and i get angry and i don’t like to feel this way.
      This estranged relationship started in 11/2016 ; before this i would travel once a month to see the family; when the first grandcchild was born; she knows me and i feel like the expression Out of Site Out of Mind
      will occur.
      Faith and prayer helps at times but the void and pain wwithin y heart is so strong; i am trying to accept that my daughter will not change so i don’t keep setting myself up for disappintment.
      Thank you for your share and i’ll be keeping all in prayer..

  8. Oceanspeace

    Extremely trying times. Still aching from being rejected by my oldest daughter and not getting to see or even speak to my young grandchildren, now this horrible virus. My 30 year old single daughter is in New York City, alone, working as a nurse, on the front line of this terrible mess. I am worried beyond measure. My only solace is walking in my neighborhood and listening to music, that gives me some peace. I have also been talking to my sisters more often as well.

    Reply
    1. rparents Post author

      Thank you, Oceanspeace,
      I think I am going to turn on music for a bit tomorrow. I don’t think I listen to it enough. Now may be a good time to incorporate a music time into my day.

      Thank you for sharing.

      ❤️
      Sheri McGregor

  9. Kristi

    I’m checking in. COVID-19 has solidified 2 things for me. 1) my kids honestly don’t give a crap about me or my husband. 2) I’m finally really, truly ok with that. I have reached out to all three of them. I actually did get an obligatory response from all of them. I know this is so much better than no response and I am thankful that I did get responses. It is a little better than it has been in the past. I did go to lunch with my daughter twice and got to see my grandson at one of those lunches for the first time in 14 months. It was wonderful, we had good conversations. The third time I asked her to go to lunch she said no, she needed to set boundaries. I expected it so I wasn’t devastated. I remain thankful for the time I did get. It would be so nice for them to call or text to say “hey mom, how are you and dad doing?” I don’t think that’s going to happen. I don’t expect it so, instead of being disappointed if they don’t reach out, I will be thankful if they do. I can’t control how my kids treat me all I can control is my response to them. I choose to show them love no matter what. I pray all the time that God will restore my family. God is in control and I know His promises. I’m just waiting for Him to do whatever work He is doing. I am focused on me and my husband, our life together, our health and our happiness. If my family isn’t reconciled in my lifetime, at least I’m living my best life now. It’s taken so many years to get to where I am now. Buckets and buckets of tears cried, I wish I was exaggerating. I am done with the crying. I’m done feeling guilty that I wasn’t a good mom, I was. I’m done feeling like I’m missing out on so much, my kids are the ones missing out and causing my grandson to miss out on so much love we have to give. Though my husband and I are not blameless in our kids feelings toward us, I will never understand unforgiving people, especially when it’s your own kids. But, I’m done trying to understand it. I give forgiveness much quicker now that I know what it’s like to be judged instead of forgiven. This whole thing has taught me so much about myself and other people and I’m so grateful for that.
    God bless all of you on this journey. Try to remember you have a choice everyday to be the best of you. Keep loving, keep giving, keep smiling. God is in control!

    Reply
  10. Janet

    I’ve been dealing with an emotionally abusive daughter since she was a teenager. Our relationship is always on eggshells and she has recently broken my heart and esteem once again since she said I crossed one of her boundaries by mentioning my granddaughter’s 2nd birthday party on social media before she did. It was just a video of my granddaughter from the virtual birthday party singing twinkle twinkle little star. I was told via text to delete it or face the consequences. Then my daughter told me that I was too needy and I had no friends that cared on Facebook anyway. I can’t tell you how hard I cried yesterday and I’m a tough women! I know I just severed my seeing my granddaughter for who knows how long and we cared for her at least 1 day a week along with evenings, weekends, and even 2 weeks last May when my daughter and her husband went to Europe. My daughter says such hateful and hurtful things to me and I don’t know why I’ve put up with it to except for the last 2 years to see my sweet granddaughter who adores nana and papa. The adoration is mutual and makes this last episode that more painful. I’m heartbroken.

    Reply
    1. Kristi

      Janet,
      I’m so sorry! My heart is breaking for you! You need to know that how your daughter treats you has nothing to do with you. She has something inside of her that doesn’t belong and lashing out is how she tries to get rid of it. Who knows what that thing inside her is, but it’s there, causing more destruction every day. Pray for her. I’ve been where you are, still am, but I’ve learned I can’t control anything except my response. It still hurts like hell but, it weirdly gives me a sense of control knowing I have no control. God bless you! Remember God is close to the broken-hearted. Prayers for you!

  11. Betty M.

    Thank you for your inspiring posts; I truly appreciate every one of them. I am the mother of two children, a son and a daughter. Both of them are estranged from me for the past three years. I have a good support system, I find joy in volunteering for several organizations in my area and most days, I am happy as can be expected. I try not to obsess over things that I cannot change. The quarantine has been tough on me because I feel isolated. Today has been tougher than usual and I suddenly have realized what’s going on….tomorrow is my daughter’s birthday. My baby girl that I have no contact with. I remember the way her skin felt and the way she smelled the day she was born; my heart was full and I felt like my life was perfect. So after thinking about this I have to decide that yes, that day seemed perfect as well as others during that time in my life. Time goes by, situations change and things happen that have broken my heart but my spirit and my capacity to enjoy life is still present. I deserve happiness and to experience joy. I wish all of you peace and as always, thank you for the opportunity to write my feelings.

    Reply
    1. rparents Post author

      Hi Betty,

      Awe, yes, the sweet memories. Those times were genuine and I know just what you mean. Like this beautiful little bubble when life was so ideal. And yes, you’re right. There is still a life to savor, a capacity to love and enjoy…

      Stay well. We’ll be out of this strange time before long!

      Hugs ❣️
      Sheri McGregor

  12. Sally

    This is the worst pain I’ve gone through in my life. I was a single mother most of my life, married to an abusive man. Now my kids have rewritten history and are abusive toward me. It’s beyond shocking because I’m the parent who stuck it out, I’m the parent who remained with them as a loving and caring mother, I’m the parent who played both roles. Why are they holding my feet to the fire and letting their abusive absentee father off the hook? The pain of all this is incomprehensible. All I do is apologize for our lives and their childhood. I thought I was a successful parent, a good parent. I know without a doubt that I raised two wonderful sons all on my own. Now I’m called names and excluded. How can someone you love more than life itself not love you back? Why do I feel such intense love for them but they don’t feel the same for me? I can’t understand any of this. Did they somehow inherit their father’s abusive nature? Is there anything I can do to explain how our lives were from my point of view? They loved me and I loved them and now it’s all changed. It’s like having three abusive people label you things you aren’t. I know I’m such a good person but I’m cursed at, called the F word, the B word, hung up on, told how I didn’t do this right or that right. Why do they have a united front against me now?

    Reply
    1. Kristine M

      Awww hon,
      I feel the exact same way. The Emotional Abuse Im accused of is actually the things my son did to me as a teen.
      My ex- his father, was absolutely a Narcissist. My son is as well- but my son – unfortunately- seems to be more Sociopathic 8n that he derives pleasure from my pain.
      I do believe it is a genetic mental illness- & bwcause I am accepting & nonjudgenental regarding most people, full of compassion with a bit of a wobnly self esteem due to childhoid trauma- I made the perfwct target. Maybe you too?
      Ive been reading Alot abiut Narcssists & Sociopaths. Sadly, there is not much hopw for insight or treatment on their end. They feel entitled & see nothing wrong with using people. Its been an eye opwner for me

  13. Crystal

    Dear Sheri,

    Your book “Done with the Crying”, has been a life changer for me. It is six years this month, since my beautiful daughter called me in the afternoon, to let me know she had decided to not have me in her life any longer. To this day, it’s both puzzling and heartbreaking recalling that day. I had just hours earlier walked a smoothie and a bag of grapes to her as she dropped by to pick up her pup I had babysat the night before, and adopted for her on her 18th birthday three months prior. (A memory I cling to, as there was no sign of anything like this coming to say the least) The first few years I think I was in denial along with my disbelief and heartbreak. I would send regular texts letting her know I loved her unconditionally, and my door would always be open. Until I was blocked. She would cite broad yet vague references of why she was choosing to estrange herself and reiterate her wishes to have no contact with me. I would ask for her to clarify, and she would say things like I robbed her of her childhood, and didn’t let her make decisions for herself. Never giving me anything in particular that I could answer to. Other than say I was truly remorseful, and sorry for ANY pain she might feel at my doing. All the while, like many in your book, struggling for answers on my own. I tried so hard to respect her wishes to let her make THIS decision. I kept coming back to the undeniable fact, that I was her Mother, and that would never change. And as such, I made the decision to maintain my role as a mom, no matter what role she was deciding for me. I continued to send regular emails, particularly on holidays, just wanting her to know I would always be here if she ever needed me. For awhile, she responded with very short, curt messages, with my asking if she would please consider meeting with me and any licensed practitioner of her choice. All to no avail. Unfortunately, my ex husband and his family have a familial pattern of alienation. I just never could’ve imagined myself on the other end of it. My daughter and I had a very happy, healthy mother/daughter bond which makes all of this all that more confusing. Like many adult children that take these steps, she completely erased every one from her life up until that point. My entire family, all her childhood friends, including her Highschool friends. So that she could pursue her new life without her mother, or anyone that would perhaps challenge her decision in moving forward without ANY contact with me, or anyone else she had erased. I’ve maintained my decision to never question or dispute her perception, judge her, or guilt her over her decision to cut all ties with me, despite crippling pain and devastation over the years. At the end of the day, I’m reminded of her beautiful, kind spirit during the precious years I had with her. Her servant’s heart, and megawatt smile. I think of all the beauty she must still bring to the world with her artistic soul. I’ve decided to focus on the “what is” that I know of life with her previous to the estrangement, rather than the “what if”…. Like so many here, I have cried enough tears for a lifetime. It’s interesting, I had bought your book last year, but the title honestly frightened me. Just the word “Done” on it’s own defied my every thought of reconciliation. But as life would have it, I dove into it head first at the beginning of March, with this new found time on my hands… And within the first chapter, I found more relief than I had recieved through countless therapy visits. While I am forever thankful for all the guidance they provided me, and the heartache they got me through, for once, I had a Manual! One that, chapter by chapter, spelled out my experience in so many ways… almost to a T at times, all the while, reminding me that I wasn’t alone. But instead, a decorated member of a club no one would ever choose to be a member of! Your book was like medicine through my veins. I know there will still be moments, and there have been. Especially in this time of great uncertainty, with many reaching out with concern for my heart in these moments. But knowing your story, and the story of so many others, along with practical, well studied advice on how to move through the moments, I have come to LOVE the title of your book… actually using it as a mantra for when I get hit with strong emotion and a tinge of hopelessness in the situation. I just stop, take a deep breath, and gently remind myself that I am “Done with the Crying”. The tears still come now and then, and my heart hurts for all those in our same boat. But I have a strength and newfound resilience that is new, exciting, and encouraging. My life and outlook have changed. Even in the face of this virus, which admittedly has again struck me with blows of heartbreak, I feel hopeful and joyful for the future. I’m able to focus on my blessings, on my health and well-being, and those around me. Full knowing, there will be a beautiful life for her (including a loving stepdad and two step siblings she has yet to meet) to return to if she so chooses. Until then, I am her Mom, and so I will remain. And I will forever wish her well.

    Gratitude and Blessings,
    Crystal

    Reply
    1. rparents Post author

      Dear Crystal,

      I want to tell you how much I appreciate receiving your note here. Thank you so much for letting me know that I have been helpful to you! I am so very sorry that you have endued the pain that you have. I love that you have come to appreciate the title. When I first started to write the book, I didn’t have a title… But as I talked more openly about the issue (while writing the book), the phrase became MY mantra. That was how it was chosen. There comes a time when you know you must be done and move forward for your own well being.

      Thank you again for your beautiful note. Your one among multitudes of lovely, kind, caring parents who nevertheless find themselves in our “club.”

      Hugs to you,
      Sheri McGregor

  14. Taylor

    I am new here, my daughter went off to college and stopped all communication with me. I really am blindsided. I also am embarrassed and feel like a bad parent. Everyone asks how she is adjusting to being back at home, or how it was to have her home for Christmas. I feel like I have to lie or make an excuse because it somehow reflects on me. I’m just sad it really is a grieving process.

    Reply
  15. John

    Hi Taylor – A very complicated grief because it is ongoing and not generally recognised. You will, hopefully, gain strength from Sheri’s book and this website. My wife, I and others here know your pain (even if we can’t always ease it). Keep strong where you can.
    John

    Reply
  16. Sue

    In June it will be 10 years since I’ve seen my son who will turn 32 in July.
    About five years ago he stopped responding to any of my emails or letters or birthday cards, etc.
    He won’t answer when I’ve asked what was wrong, why he cut off all contact between us.
    We were so close, even and especially through, his teenage and college years.

    My heart breaks nearly every day but Mother’s Day and his birthday the hardest. I still reach out to him to wish him a Happy Birthday or Merry Christmas and get no reply.
    I reached out to him during the initial phase of the virus lockdown just let him know if he needed anything I was here, and no response.
    I’ve had to rewrite my story because when friends ask how is your son doing or is he coming home for Christmas etc. I’m so tired telling people that my son wants nothing to do with me. It hurts.

    Reply

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