Thanksgiving for hurting parents of estranged adult children (part 2)

hurting parents of estranged adult childrenby Sheri McGregor, M.A.

In October, I posted about some different ways to think of Thanksgiving (to help Canadians who celebrated their Thanksgiving at that time). Readers from all over the world frequent the blog–and my aim is always to help with healing for the hurting parents of  estranged adult children.

Now that the U.S. holiday is near, give that post a read. Maybe you’ll agree that even as hurting parents of estranged adult children, Thanksgiving can be a time of harvest.

Below are a few other ideas and some more past articles for hurting parents of estranged adult children who might be spending the holiday alone or feeling isolated.

Time on your hands? Three ways to use those hours wisely.

Beat the crowds. Get a little holiday shopping completed early. Online deals abound even on Thanksgiving Day. Amazon.com has everything from gourmet food to health and beauty items, toys to tools, furniture to vitamins to gifts of every sort. Shop at Amazon

Take a nature walk at a state park. Many of the state parks host free admission on “green Friday” hurting parents of estranged adult childrenthe day after Thanksgiving. Check out your area’s parks to see if they’re participating, and spend Thanksgiving planning a take-along lunch. Wouldn’t it be fun to take a friend on a picnic on Friday, and get in a little nature time too?

Finish your holiday cards early–or just write letters. In these days of electronic cards and email, old fashioned paper greetings are getting rare. If you have time on your hands, turn on a TV marathon and write out some friendly notes. Your recipients will appreciate the extra care, and who knows? Maybe you’ll restart a tradition!

This year will be the first time I ever celebrated Thanksgiving at a restaurant. It’ll be a small party, and I am looking so forward to the varied buffet! Usually, I don’t mind cooking, but this year I felt the need to make a change. Do you? It’s okay to do things differently. Changing up does not mean you’ll never cook the meal again or you’re letting yourself or others down. There’s a saying I’ve come to believe: Change is good!

What ideas do you have for spending quiet time (Thanksgiving Day or any holiday) well? I hope you’ll help other hurting parents of estranged adult children by leaving a comment.

Also, don’t miss these past articles to help hurting parents of estranged adult children on Thanksgiving:

Giving Thanks–It’s the real reason for the holiday. And gratitude can help hurting parents of estranged adult children any day.

Help for hurting parents of estranged adult children for the holidays—How to manage them.

Hugs to everyone on Thanksgiving Day and every day.

Full disclosure, the Amazon.com link above is an affiliate link–that means if you use the link to shop, a small portion is earned to help fund this site.

 

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7 thoughts on “Thanksgiving for hurting parents of estranged adult children (part 2)

  1. Kimberly

    Unfortunately in my case, my youngest of three now completely cut me off. Years I suffered with this. His 19 birthday was Nov. 13. I arrived thinking I’d take him out to eat, then buy his birthday gift together. My mom interrupted as I asked first question ” how do you feel?”she was all over the place. Talking. Pacing. Interupted where to eat. I fell silent every time. Sudden anger from him he screamed” you guys keep fighting” ran off. My mom with hate in her face for me said ” he waited for you for two hours” no. Been little over 39 min. I drove home, crying ,cold, soul ripped out. It’s been my mom & twice restrained ex. he no money no job, owes but never paid child support. Win? They have. It don’t stop. Even so they take more now. on Wed.nov 16 19yr old cut me off by phone, email, facebook & messenger. I’m frantic. I asked my oldest son to have youngest contact me, due to years of ex & my mom saying “I did” & “I said”? My youngest has made threats to hurt himself.youngest texted Thur Nov 17. It i wish to share. In boxed or private. I can’t here. But it’s in short this- FU you you are dead to me. Never been a mom. Never supported your kids. Fing psychopath . He hates me. Do not ever tire in leave me alone. Get it through your stupid Fing head. Get your sh__ together . Support at least yourself. How dare I talk to my oldest that way. – on & on. He texted. My blood ran cold, drained anything left. Cut me each word. Insanity, this is pathology. I plainly was my three kids ONLY Christmas, birthdays,school ,& functions,all medical. Supported them. Now five years near out side of same house? Self independently supporting myself.& He’s telling me? And how dare I talk that way? To My oldest son. Far deep . My case is thick. Very sick. Very heartbreaking. No way to penetrate. No groups where I live. & Because of this & years now I have become totally isolated. No family , no friends. I wish someone knew of just this of my life. Little. but enough. So as to set out a extra Thanksgiving plate. To welcome me in to their family’. Not mine I realize this. But the kindness, warmth in being welcomed in their family, for thanks is very valuable To this loving mother. I have been denied giving, I have got so much. Lord Jesus bless you all and your children. Young and grown children. Amen.

    Reply
  2. renee

    Ive found these posts ot be very encouraging. Ive had dreams about my children and they were good dreams of healing and restoration. I don’t know when this will take place. But, Ive given them to God. I will not put up with abuse. I know how to have healthy boundaries now. and even though being apart from them hurts, I’m going on with life.. God allows what we allow.. if we have a healthy outlook and get council on how not to fix control and cure things will change.. I trust my children will find hope and the blindness will be removed one day. I was an I am still a good mother..

    Reply
  3. Annie

    Good for you Renee. Sounds like you’ve worked through a lot. God is in control. We cannot control our adult children’s behavior. I do hope your dreams come true and your relationships will be restored. And as Sheri
    states, you will thrive. I’m sure you are still and always have been a good Mother. Keep the faith and many blessings to you. Annie

    Reply
    1. rparentsrparents Post author

      Annie,
      I’ve seen your supportive comments to other parents here … and wanted to thank you. To those you write directly, and to others who happen along and read your thoughts, your kind words are like a gentle hug. Thank you for being you.

      Sheri McGregor

  4. Annie

    Thank you Sheri. We’ve all helped each other thanks to you. I hope to keep up.
    I will have some unexpected surgery soon but will continue to contribute when I can. It’s such a gift that we have one another. Blessings, Annie

    Reply
  5. Denice

    I’ve tried several years of being there for my daughter financially emotionally today was last straw she said at least I hv house it hurt cause my jobs on the road wth my husband everything went good for two years then I went to see her for thanksgiving made dinner told her about it they come over to hotel they aren’t hungry really hurt me then lost my contract job starting another Tuesday she kicks me down more she’s ex drug addict takes methadone blames me for everything and I never realized how angry I really was till today I prayed to God to handle it I wrote her a letter cuz you can’t talk to her on the phone without screaming hope one day I’m forgiven by her told her I loved her she said we can’t have relationship becuz of the past I did my best but it’s up to god now ty for listening I’m glad I’m not alone this website is helping my heart and prayers go out to each and every one of you.

    Reply

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